random ranting

Yep, just me talking crap. I have a few pet hates, and one of them is when people write in a blog or email or whatever, "this isn't aimed at anyone in particular but..." cos you know straight away that it is, and they're just trying to cover their own behind, as it is usually followed by a very pointed, aggressive and angry sounding diatribe of garbage. Trust me, this happens to me a lot.

Another pet hate of mine is something I'm sure a most people in the world hate: being judged by other people who quite obviously don't have a clue about your life. This also seems to happen a lot, not just to me. For example, I've been accused of being a liar, when I told this person the absolute truth to start with. She just thinks that I was trying to spare her feelings, which is not the case. I'm over trying to appease people, I've been honest with them even when they DON'T want me to be.

That leads me to the topic of arrogance. Yes my friends, they're out there, all those pig-headed, selfish, boorish beings: the arrogant people. Now, have you ever noticed that "this isn't aimed at you", being judgemental and being arrogant all seem to go hand in hand? Anyway, by arrogant I do not necessarily mean people with confidence. By definition, to be arrogant is to be overbearingly proud. That excessive pride leads to selfish behaviour and judgemental attitudes. And they still want to cover their own backside as well, to save face. Alas that I know a few people like this.

Yes, there is a lot of pet hates and issues at work here. I know what I like, and I know what I don't like. I don't mind confident, friendly people...I just can't stand the qualities mentioned above. Just so you know.

By the way, this entry isn't aimed at anyone in particular...

conflict

Conflict is a word that should not exist, yet sadly it must in order to describe the breaking down of relationships, the physical violence between two parties, or all out war between nations/factions.

I hate the word conflict and everything it embodies. I guess this makes me a pacifist. Well so be it. Conflict is so negative. Even conflict born of good intentions is wrong. Because who's to say which side has the better intentions?

all good

Well this friend that I mentioned before and I had a rather long, good chat about stuff. So far so good, things are on the right track. At least, everything ended yesterday on a positive note, which is more than I expected.

life is breezy...for now

Well, life isn't that easy, but there are no heavy burdens, no regrets, no thoughts of revenge or grudges. I can live my life in the way that I want, which is a good life. Not good as in wealth and all that stuff, good as in surrounded by smiling faces, contributing to other people's lives in a positive way, and just generally enjoying being alive. I really feel like I've reached a place in my mind where I can be content with the way things are for me. Took me long enough, but it's happened.

My only hope now is that it lasts after tomorrow when apparently a long overdue "chat" is happening. I'll keep you posted.

the magic is gone

I am becoming increasingly disenchanted with the human race. How could you not with all the crap you see on the news? Life is getting harder and harder to live happily ever after, if anyone ever really did in the first place. People out there killing other innocent and not-so-innocent people alike, war, famine, and then closer to home there are the people who manipulate and backstab to gain their own selfish goals. Honestly, is there a point to this mess of being human? I no longer harbour any illusions that everyone is inherently good. Some people don't have an ounce of respectfulness or common decency in their veins.

I know that there are the good ones still out there somewhere, I might even know a few of them which makes life just that little bit more worthwhile. And to be perfectly honest, I don't feel like I'm one of the good ones anymore. I'm way too bitchy and selfish deep down to be one of the gems that saves the human race from being a total loss.

Dammit, I wanted to contribute to the lives of others, but the trouble is that you can never tell who genuinely is pleased to have you in their lives and who are faking. Gah, shut up brain!

leo

The Lion has finally showed herself...I'm finally sticking up for myself when some people (I won't name names) decide to talk or walk all over me. I say to those people, "NO MORE! No more will I be subjected to being treated like a lesser being." So there mean people!

damn flu

The flu finally caught up with me!

Well the lunch date went really well, and if I wasn't so darn ill I'd be meeting him again today, just to hang out and stuff. The other day was awesome, we have a lot in common and talked for hours.

By the way Cozza, his name is Dan!

to date or not to date

Well, I don't know whether to call it a date or not - I'm having lunch tomorrow with a guy friend of Ann's who is looking for a nice girl apparently. And he's only 19 which concerns me a little bit. Apart from the age difference, he's an interesting guy and really nice, but I don't know if I can get past the age thing. What do you think?

yesterday was my birthday!

I am now 22 years old. Yay for me!

I'm was really touched by the number of people who remembered:

Tracy, Jay, Dad, Jenny, Mama and Pop, Mum and Bone, Sylvie, Pete, Ann, Corrie, Ross, Eleanor, Robin and Roz, Jess and Hannah.

I was a bit peeved that Bazz and Ganno seemed to have forgotten though...grrr