Forbidden

This is a poem written about a friend, though they have no idea about any of these feelings of mine, and I'll probably never tell them. I mean, as the title suggests, anything with this person is basically forbidden!

FORBIDDEN

I think back with fond regret,
Shy friends, together in grief
For the loss of innocence,
Yet worlds apart, torn apart,
Trapped in solitude of our own making.
All alone in a mist of beautiful nightmares,
You found me surrounded by silver flames.
Your intense glances gently pushed me
To be genuine and pure.
I can never reach for your soft light,
Untouchable for me.
Crystal tears of loss line my face,
Though you were never mine.

early birthday present

I got my first birthday present today, even though my actual birthday isn't for 2 weeks yet. Tifa from Final Fantasy VII Advent Children. Jelbie eat your heart out!

claustrophobic

I'm getting a bit sick of seeing the same people and places over and over and over...not that my friends here aren't great, they are, but I need a change. A big change.

I am ill at the moment, a stomach bug decided it likes me, so once I feel better I might just have to go somewhere else for a few days.

fighting

No, I'm not fighting with anyone at the moment. I just feel as though I'm fighting an uphill battle, and it's with myself. Meaning that it's mainly internal problems, so no one else can really help me sort it out.

I'm having major trust issues, I'm highly anxious, and I feel useless. None of that is really new to me, but I did think I was past all that awhile ago now. I'm a bit reluctant to talk to people about it because I know I already burden them so much as it is, and I know that they won't be able to do anything to help the way I'm feeling which might make them feel bad. I am very mixed up at the moment, and it's really overwhelming me to the point that I don't think I can sort it out.

I'd go to the doctor about it, but I'm too anxious to talk about it to one!

back to normal

My sister went home today, so things are back to normal around here...boring.

My birthday is coming up soon, but I honestly don't think I'll end up doing anything for it. I wouldn't mind doing something, but I have no idea what. Any suggestions?

tired

I am tired of trying to get people together to do things and have no one turn up. Fair enough if people don't have the money, but when they just don't make the effort it really gets to me seeing as I've put in the effort to try to get something together in the first place.

From now on, someone else can do it, maybe then people will bother turning up.