moved on?

At the risk of sounding all 'Sex and the City', I'm just going to rave a little about where my head is at as far as relationships are concerned.

I don't have a problem with relationships, most, actually pretty much all of my friends are in relationships, and they're happy. So that's good. Except when I'm out with my friends and I'm the only one there without a significant other, thats been happening a lot lately.

What really happens for a good relationship to get started? More to the point, what is supposed to happen when one ends? I personally thought I was well and truly over my major relationships, but lately I've been thinking of Ben a lot seeing as I run into his older brother and cousins at uni or out at the pubs all the time.

And the Bazz one, thats just weird. I thought that all my anger over what he said to me would cancel out any 'ambiguous' feelings I had about everything. But now, well I'm a bit miffed that he doesn't want to crash here with everyone for Village Fair after contacting me about when its on, etc. Is that weird? It probably is. I shouldn't even care after everything. What is going on with me???

It's really bugging me, I want to move on, find someone I like who genuinely likes me back. But for some reason I keep sabotaging myself and any chance I have at finding someone like that.